Beam me up, Scotty.

Based on the messages we have received from family and friends, I’m sure that if Star Trek’s transporter technology worked they would without hesitation beam us out of Tokyo.

But despite the best efforts of many so-called “news” media, I don’t feel afraid to be in Tokyo. I’m not unnamed Starfleet crewman #2. With the tricorder information I have here I am confident that my continued exploration of Tokyo is much safer than being dematerialized, where I would risk being trapped in a pattern buffer for 70 years, or cloned by inadvertent reflection off the ionosphere.

I’m glad to say that the radiation threatening my life, just like the transporter, does not yet exist.